Last night, on a Wednesday night at 9pm, I got to pet twin pygmy goats. In my trailer park.
Miracles do happen.
Those of you that know me know that I have been obsessed with pygmy goats for years now and plan to have an entire herd. As soon as possible. BTW, if you are one of those weird individuals that does not know of the mystical pygmy goat, here is a video:
Imagine my delight when I got to pet TWINS last night!
Our neighbor, the one with the tiny pig, just bought them. They are moving out next week, so I have to take advantage of my goat time while I can get it. Unfortunately, I didn’t get a photo of the goats, but I do have one of Alvin, their pig.
Me: How much weight do you want to lose?
JR: Not TOO much – I want to be somewhere in between “I think she might be pregnant” and “OMG, I bet she’s leaving her husband.”
Me: Cool – I’m going for more of “I think she’s having a midlife crisis.”
Sometimes it’s not about the number of pounds, folks.
Up until three weeks ago, I had been doing GREAT on my weight loss journey. 16 pounds down!!! Then I took a mini vacation and never quite got back on track. Today that is changing.
I lost that 16 pounds by doing Medi Weight Loss for several weeks and then deciding to do a low carb diet after that. Today I am going to begin a carb cycling journey. I used this calculator to determine how many carbs I should eat on low carb and high carb days.
One huge part of my being able to lose 16 pounds was reading this book. My therapist recommended it when I told him that unless I got my head straight, I would never be able to keep off my weight. I highly recommend it to anyone who has had trouble losing weight in the past and knows that they use food as a crutch or a drug.
I am committing to doing carb cycling for one month to see how it goes. Our trip to Jamacia is coming up and I want to lose at least another 9 pounds. : ) Yay for vacations!!!
So, I decided to start a little game with my friends. We are all creative types who long to hang out together, but live miles apart. The best thing about living far away from a friend is by far, getting snail mail.
Last week, I got a wonderful birthday package from a dear friend in Austin, Texas. It included the last two books he read, along with two drawings and a list of the music he is currently listening to. The books and the package inspired me, so I decided to write him back.
I sent him the following package:
1 drawing with my current music playlist written on it
1 handwritten letter
2 amazingly awesome photos that I printed from the interwebs
In the letter, I challenged him to create something amazing with the photos that I sent him. I called it the Great Boobie Challenge of 2014. I also told him that he should send me a challenge as well.
But, I didn’t stop there.
I also sent another friend in New Orleans the same package and same to pictures.
I am so excited to see what they come up with and I hope that one or both of them sends me a challenge in return.
Now, I am going to issue the challenge to you, reader. Take the two photos below and create something wonderful. Leave a link to a photo of your work in the comments. Happy creating!
Feelings of self hate are something that I have had to deal with since childhood. The past few days, they have gotten the best of me. Last night I went to yoga and all I could think about was how disgusting I look.
Women like me, most of the time, we’re good. We are comfortable with our bodies and we dress them well. Then sometimes, we catch a glance of ourselves in the mirror at yoga and all of that self confidence goes to shit.
We think – there’s a reason women like me don’t go to yoga – we look disgusting and awful and shouldn’t be allowed to wear a tank top in public. Who cares that we are trying to better ourselves by being there, the internal fire in our minds says, get the fuck out- you don’t belong here.
People aren’t mean to us at the gym. No one has ever said anything about the way we look. The negativity comes from inside us. Where was all this self-hatred born and how do we get rid of it?
I wish I knew the answer. I wish I could enlighten you all. I wish I could enlighten myself.
But with every disgusting thought I have at yoga, I am pushing myself towards betterment. I keep going, even with the hate filled, torturous thoughts and so should you. Keep at it. Take it one class at a time.
I don’t know if my body will ever change in any meaningful, positive way, but I know that with practice, my mind will. And that’s all women like me can ask.